life ain't no movie

but it certainly does have a way of flashing before you, and behind you.

a year goes by.

Lifing out loud

It just occurred to me that all I ate last year was left over brown sugar and oatmeal.

Work is totally bananas these days.

I miss New York. I miss love.

I'd like to go to some sort of physical boot camp - fitness has been really appealing lately.

stuck

It feels wrong. I think it's time to take a different approach. 

Maybe read some more Ra Bonewitz. 

Maybe more out, less in.

Maybe more sun salutation.

Maybe get a dog, or any pet for that matter.

Maybe less running, more walking.

Maybe more fortuitous ass.

Maybe get into crystal healing. 

Maybe less city and more country.

I don't know. Something needs to change?

shopping

my friend alison lewis (formerly of mooka kinney)
just debuted her new line of dresses, lewis,
with a lovely new lookbook, to boot!:

click image for more looks

In the last week, I....

-moved to the hood

-played girl talk (the game)

-enjoyed free DNC coverage on msnbc.com

-ate nothing

-drank everything

-lived sans TV/cable

-painted my living room weezer blue

-saw adam newman

-listened to the Clueless soundtrack

-increased my crisis management skills

-got super nostalgic about nyc

-dreamed i got eaten alive by a doberman

-caught a cold

180°

Finally busy again. Idle hands....as they say.

Will post pics of the new house soon. So rad, I can't even believe it.
Roomates are golden. Thug life is nice.

Posting lots of stuff here because it has nothing to do with my MOODS.

k bi

failure pile in a sadness bowl

Always cheers me up.

torch songs

Last week's This American Life episode was everything I've ever wanted out of TAL. I was supposed to pack up my belongings (moving sucks), but I just lay in bed totally captivated by stories of break-ups.

In true TAL fashion, the tales were all of the extreme, of the obscure, but relatable accounts of breaking up.

The episode opens with Sarah's explanation of how excruciating, yet addictive it can be to wallow in break-up melancholy. Her boyfriend broke up with her. They shared an (at first ironic, but then legit) love of Phil Colins. Sarah examines the beauty of the break-up song (and how wonderful they are for shameless brooding), writes her own, and even consults Phil Colins himself!

I was kind of surprised and comforted to hear another person's detailed admission of almost enjoying the pain and anguish that comes with a break up only because it gives you an excuse to completely strip down all dignity and "find meaning in songs you hear at the grocery store." I love listening to sad songs when I'm sad. That's not to say that I love being sad. Well maybe I do. I just love the way sappy songs allow you shamelessly bask in the pathetic cloud of self pity.

Okay, Sarah says it way better:

There's something so satisfying about listening to sad songs. They're like how you would actually be spending your day, if you were allowed to just break down and sob and grab ahold of everyone you've ever met.

They make you feel less alone with their crazy thoughts. They don't judge you. In fact, they understand you. A break up song won't ever suggest you start online dating, or that you're better off without them. They tell you that you're worse without them, whichis exactly what you want to hear because that's how you feel.

I didn't want to be cheered up. I didn't want to bounce back. I didn't want to meet someone new. I wanted to wallow. Big time. Deeply. And with the least amount of perspective possible. And the only way to do that was by turning off my phone, and turning up the sad sad music.

And then she plays us "I don't want to get over you" by The Magnetic Fields (one of my favorites, too).

It's been like, I don't even know...three(ish?) years since my last break-up/relationship. But I still remember the pain when I hear songs I used to listen to during that time.

With that, here's my list of all time favorite break-up / sappy songs. No order.

Don't know why - Kostars (listen)
You don't miss your water - The Byrds (listen)
Right about now - Ron Sexsmith (listen)
Good things - Sleater Kinney (listen)
Can't seem to make you mine - The Seeds (listen)
Remember (walking in the sand) - Shangri Las (listen)
Perfect day - Lou Reed (listen)
Comfort me - Carla Thomas (listen)
Heart like a Wheel - Kate & Anna McGarrigle (listen)
Within your reach - Replacements (listen)
Crying all by myself - William Bell (listen)
Up the junction - Squeeze (listen)
Don't thing twice, it's alright - Bob Dylan (listen)
Tonight - Sybille Baier (listen)
Lord kill the pain - Red House Painters (listen)
Metal heart - Cat Power (listen)
Sometimes I still feel the bruise - Trembling Blue Stars (listen)
I fall to pieces - Patsy Cline (listen)
Hey that's no way to say goodbye - Leonard Cohen (listen)
Think for yourself - The Beatles (listen)
Some good advice - Bill Fay (listen)
I'm not saying - Nico (listen)
You can't have me - Big Star (listen)
Whenever you're ready - Zombies (listen)
I don't really love you anymore - Magnetic Fields (listen)
Wild world - Cat Stevens (listen)
These things take time - The Smiths (listen)
Set me free - The Kinks (listen)
You're no good - ESG (listen)
Play with fire - Rolling Stones (listen)
You gotta move - Heatmiser (listen)
Prayer to god - Shellac (listen)
Drift - Ginger Envelope (listen)
I wanna be adored - Stone Roses (listen)
Nothing but a heartache - The Flirtations (listen)
Divorce song - Liz Phair (listen)
This mess we're in - Thom Yorke & PJ Harvey (listen)
Oh well, okay - Elliott Smith (listen)
You go to my head - Billie Holiday (listen)
Quicksand - Dinosaur Jr. (listen)
Something about what happens when we talk - Lucinda Williams (listen)
You broke my heart - Lavender Diamond (listen)
Sunday girl - Blondie (listen)
Tiger trap - Beat Happening (listen)
Lost cause - Beck (listen)
The bright new year - Bert Jansch (listen)
Thirteen - Big Star (listen)
Landlocked blues - Bright Eyes & Emmylou Harris (listen)
Hope - Descendents (listen)
Reservations - Wilco (listen)
About today - The National (listen)
Life's a gas - T. Rex (listen)
Sad and beautiful world - Sparklehorse (listen)
Mourning rain - Sleepy Jackson (listen)
Don't look back in anger - Oasis (listen)

I probably left some out but I could go on for days...

If you have any suggestions let me know - I'm always up for a brooding sesh.

( LISTEN TO THE THIS AMERICAN LIFE EPISODE ! ! ! ! )

thumbs down

Okay, so forgive me for sounding like a crotchety old lady, but
IS THERE NO MORAL INTEGRITY IN JOURNALISM ANYMORE????

The Creative Loafing's cover story on the youth heroin "epidemic" in Atlanta (ironically following the "College Guide" issue) is exactly the kind of daft nonsense that after-school programs are made of. Poorly executed. Out of touch. And serving as a not-so-covert handbook on how to get high.

Not to mention the cover is illustrated like a fucking comic book (target audience?):


On top of all that, they go ahead and provide prospective users with exactly which neighborhood* ― with directions! ― in Atlanta sells the best smack.

Maybe I'm a hard-ass. Maybe I'm just getting older. Maybe this shit comes a little too close to home and I know exactly how I would read this article 5 years ago. It's just that I find it painfully careless to disregard the kids that might read stuff like this and go right to the Bluff to score some dope. There are so many ways to be informative sans enabling. Haven't you been around for the last 20 years?

Thumbs down, CL. You're better than this.

*My ex-user/ex-dealer friend used to sell directions to the Bluff for $50, so thanks for the freebie, I guess.

Day 3

What friends are for:

alec: turn it off kiana

alec: too early for that shit

kiana: what?

alec: wont do what the doctors order wont see someone else

alec: it says what ur listening to. im grounding u from elliott smith

kiana: oh

alec: SO WHEN IS OBAMA GONNA MAKE LIKE
A FUCKING ALBUM ALLREADY WITH TIMBALAND

alec: CALLED HOPE MOTHER FUCKER HOPE

alec: AND HIS FIRST SINGLE WILL BE CALLED THE BUMMER'S BACK

alec: AND THEN A HIT CALLED ETHNICITY AINT NOTHIN BUT A RING TONE

kiana: oh fuck. YES!

alec: OR HE COULD USE THE REMAINING MEMBERS OF SUBLIME
TO MAKE A COOL ASS REAGAE BAND BACKING HIM
BUT THE CATCH IS THAT ALLEN IVERSON IS THE HYPE MAN
AND MAJIC JOHNSTON DOES ALL THE DECORATING

Day 2

You would think I'd be a pro at quitting stuff.

But it STILL SUCKS!

Why did all the greats disband before I got a chance to see them?

The Kinks - Set me free

Descendents - When I get old

Shangri Las - Out in the streets

Replacements - I'll be you

Velvet Underground - Venus in furs
(although I did get to see John Cale and Lou Reed play on separate occasions)

T. Rex - Metal guru

things fall apart

My last hours in Brooklyn were spent on Jenn's fire escape, smoking cigarettes and waxing sentimental. It was dark. Darker than any night should be in New York City. In that seemingly isolated blackness, we heard the faint musings of a woman and a man and a guitar coming from the courtyard downstairs. Our attempt to take in every word and note was marked with intense captivation.
I wish I could have captured that moment and put it in a jar. I'd open it every time I forget that pain always has an end.


(Sorry you guys, I'm a bummer today.)

my heart's crammed in my cranium

Frank Black - Headache


It's only when things finally settle down with some semblance of normalcy that the sinister wheels of my mind begin turning.

TUMULT, why did you leave me?

just about to lose my mind

The Slits - Heard It Through The Grapevine

days go by

About a year ago, my life was saved thanks to the following places/sounds/words/etc:



The ocean wing at the Museum of Natural History



Dear Diary



Vitamin Water (defense flavor)



and The National

current events

This is for Jenn:


Too bad she ditched the internet.

Love Fest 2008

Who knew life was so easy to turn around?
Everything has been peaches and cream lately.


My Brooklyn reunion trip:
I felt like a little kid going to Disney World for the first time.
Totally overwhelming but in the best way ever. I almost puked on the plane ride up.


Who goes to NYC to get a sunburn? Me.



Z kept making me do the Olsen prune but my face won't let me.



Hanging out in Brynn's Clinton Hill apt was like entering a magical new universe. I LOVE HER.
(check out my cameo on the mirror. amateur!)



We caught up over lavender lemonade at our fave East Village cafe.



My voice is still raspy from screaming over Liz & Damian's engagement.



Jenn is my eternal soulmate. You can't have her.



McCarren Pool happened again:



Those dudes that played our kitchen in college got famous.



Not many people know that fame will turn you into a tie-dye ghost (Andrew):



I took the B-43 all the way back to sanity. It was a long ride.




Conclusion:
If you're feeling lonely, you should leave where you are. RIGHT NOW.
Go far far away for about one year. Returning will be a total love fest!
It's like make up sex for the soul.



Too bad my heart still feels like this

axis of awesome

Check out street art/graffiti from my homeland:


iran graffiti blog

my new favorite blog

hipsterrunoff.com